ahhh sugarbabies….
its been ages since a porn post….. i suppose i just like to make y’all beg for em… so….well… by now…. youre all pretty familiar with my porn player troubles….if not… click here and then here ….sooooo
i convinced a boy… to attempt to return the porn player that “swallows” … to the 8th circle of hell….i mean..umm….. Best Buy…
once we get there…..he takes the porn player over to the geek squad desk… right at the front of the store…while i go to look for a replacement…
of course… he tells the geek squad a movie is stuck in the built in dvd player…
the geeks push some buttons..scratch their heads and push some more buttons….. right about the time i get to the tubo tax display… almost to the desk… one gifted geek pushes the right sequence of buttons…
and WHAM….
the “movie” starts playing….
of course when i say movie i mean hardcore fetish porn…this is not cheerleader porn….umm….no….its good old fashioned latex… whips and chains hardcore fetish stuff…* sigh* fun i know… i know!!!….
and it is playing…. at the front desk of the Geek Squad Station @ Best Buy…. yeah…
- the geek who pushed the button…. his jaw kinda hit the counter
- the “manager” of the counter ..well…. i thought she had a cardiac incident might easily have require full blown (he he he) medical attention
- the gay dude in line..winked at me…while waving his hand over his heart…
- the dude… i had convinced to return the tv with me……turned on his heels….. locked eyes with me and shouted……loudly…. …“suicide_blond…. you bitch … you’re the one who stole my dvd!!! “
you know what can be more fun than watching freak porn????
watching white nerdy folks freak the fuck out….when porn starts playing in thier Best Buy lobby…..
OMG…. you just can not pay for entertainment like that….
xoxo
24 comments
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January 14, 2008 at 4:55 pm
legallyheidi
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahahahah thats outstanding!!
Even better than pissing off my former roommate’s super conservative girlfriend by playing the “pirates” dvd during the new years eve party in 06. She was not too happy about that. Everyone else was amused but she was just like “S!!! TURN IT OFF!!” in a whiny brat voice. Silly bible-thumping bitch
omg..WHO doesnt like jesse jane???? xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 5:07 pm
charlotte harris
are you sure you don’t keep breaking that thing just so you can have the BEST stories EVER!?
umm…as much as i hate best buy…..and love porn…umm nope… xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 5:26 pm
Uncle Keith
Sweet! You are my hero. I bet those geeks started getting uncomfortable, tingly feelings.
*blush*.. and you havent even seen me in action! i need a hero too!!! xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 5:44 pm
Arjewtino
This was hilarious. I only wish you had photo-documented their faces for posterity.
haha… if only i was that quick! lol… xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 5:56 pm
Lemmonex
Ha! This is why there is xtube…the evidence does not stay.
im sooo signing up for that!!!
xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 6:15 pm
Tessa
oh my god i think i just peed a little!!!
hahahahahaha!!!!!
aww sugar..you get paid extra for that in porn…from what i hear… of course… xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 8:00 pm
kayellejaye
Great story! That sounds like something that would happen to me.
haha…. ok good…cause sometimes i feel like im the only one who has had to return the same tv three times and had porn stuck in it each time!! xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 10:00 pm
mary
That’s an awesome story.. and I f’ing hate best buy. HATE!
i swear to god..they deserve a good fire bombing… xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 10:34 pm
wildbill
Once again, I am forced to admit how much more fun it must be to be a Blond-Blond! Did you finally either: A-Get another porn player. B-Get this porn player fixed or C- Get your (stolen) DVD back?
well bill.. yes…it is damn fun…
and..well..i scammed them inot giving me a THIRD Porn Player…. for the record the tv’s withthe built in dvd players are GOOD for OCD (no messy wires)…Bad For Everything Else! and the dvd… is safely in my possession again! hah!
xoxo
January 14, 2008 at 10:59 pm
ma
I think that you can’t get any more awesome, and then you do…
Hang out soon, please!
ok ok…but if i find out you are brunching without calling me again!!! well….
xoxo
January 15, 2008 at 8:37 am
onefaller
hey… did you go to the Caps game on sunday?
sugarbaby….why do you ask??? xoxo
January 15, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Hammer
When Best Buy’s customer service people talk about satisfaction guaranteed, something tells me this isn’t quite what they had in mind. Nice job of sticking it to the man. Or whipping the man Or chaining the man. Whatever the hell was going on at the time.
oh hammer..it would be sooo much more “satisfying” if “the man” wasnt a pimply faced 17 yr old that wasnt quite as cute as bill gates… they dont call em the geek squad for nothing…xoxo
January 15, 2008 at 4:42 pm
TC the Terrible
Was it the Best Buy out in the NOVA ‘burbs? That store created the ninth circle of Hell all by itself.
Seriously, next time you are planning on returning a porn player in the ‘burbs let me know. I’m tired of missing out on all the fun.
of course it was sugarpie.. thats how i roll… partying in the ARL…wreaking havoc in the NoVa and speeding through the LoCo…on my way straight to hell..im sure…xoxo
January 15, 2008 at 5:30 pm
onefaller
cause i think you walked past me… of course, having never met you, i could be totally wacked, but I thought it was you.
luv..i like to think…that if i walked past you…you would KNOW…. was looking squeaky clean and so fresh??? xoxo
January 15, 2008 at 8:02 pm
Jen
What was the name of that DVD? Sounds like something I need.
OMG I LMAO!!!!!
Of course, I had to lie to my seven year old about what was so funny…….
You totally rock.
I blushed when my computer geek guy (a very nice Christian guy NOT my cup of tea) came over and had to “find” my erotic romance book lost in cyberspace when my POS computer crashed. LOL. *sigh* Still prudish in my own fashion.
sugarpie..i get the feeling youre lots of things..but prudish isnt one of ‘em!! xoxo
January 15, 2008 at 11:36 pm
I-66
This is why I’m never lending you my porn.
ha..you say that now..but i can be VERY convincing when i want something…xoxo
January 16, 2008 at 4:23 pm
minijonb
aHAHAHA!!! that’s freakin’ hilarious! i’ll have to do something like that on purpose if i ever bring something into the shop forr repair. you so smart, girl!
January 16, 2008 at 9:02 pm
Mr. T in DC
That is a hilarious story – I love your blog!!
January 18, 2008 at 6:04 pm
ListenToLeon
HILARIOUS!!! I would have paid to see the looks on people’s faces in the store!
January 28, 2008 at 12:45 am
blueseaglass
I would love to ride along with you for a day – you have too much fun. And AMEN to calling “B.B.” the 8th circle of hell.
January 29, 2008 at 9:57 am
Chris
You know, you could be onto a whole new type of fetish porn – film geeky dudes freaking out at fetish porn. Wait, I just confused myself. Hopefully you know what I mean.
February 3, 2008 at 6:21 pm
eleanorstrousers
This would SO happen to me. My dear sweet gay ex-roommate had tendency to leave his gay male wrestling porn in the player that ate movies. Try explaining that….
February 17, 2008 at 1:49 pm
Annette
hahahahahhahahahahaha
February 1, 2009 at 2:01 pm
kookimebux
Hello. And Bye.