sugarbabies…

im not trying to hurt anyone… ask anyone who knows me… you’d be hard pressed to find anyone more loathe to hurt anyone’s feelings than me… truth be told im a softie…

but

i dont ask questions … and i dont like to answer questions… im extremely gifted when it comes to talking a lot but saying very little… theres a good chance you wont know anything about me after a twenty min conversation..and unless i really give a shit..and i prob dont…i wont have wanted you to tell me anything either… and if you did i can wager it was not in response to a question of mine…people love to talk…they are afraid of the silences …and if just sit there and nod…sip my vodka tonic…often they will go on and on in  intimate detail…. but … i dont ask… so if there is something that you dont want to tell me… im ok with that.. i dont need to know everything about you… and as far as im concerned you dont need to know everything about me… im private that way … sue me…so yes ive dated men whose middle name i never knew…whose age i never knew…whose job title i never knew… whose marital status… i never knew… or cared about…if youre not being honest with yourself or someone else…thats something YOU have to deal with not me… and i dont want to hear about it…please dont confess your shit to me…

i care about the moment and im selfish about it…

and i try to be up front about it…sometimes im better at it than others….but i try to say what i want…and i always warn folks that im selfish and fickle..and that i dont recommend that they get attached because i wont…and ill be gone more than im around…and that you’lll never know what to expect…that sometimes that is great and other times not so much… and i wont apologize for it… and i dont know if this makes me a bad person… but it definitely makes me me… and to be honest..im a happy person… realllly happy… i love my life…and when i look around and see allll these unhappy people lately…i just want to shake them… tell them to take responsibility for their own happiness…to stop wanting someone or some thing to make them happy…it just doesn’t work like that…that life is both deep AND ordinary at the same time … that everything is pretty through an instagram filter….. find the filter that makes your life the life YOU want… and apply it…the rest falls into place…or at least you have fun wiggling the pieces about… trust me im no picnic… but … still…. im amazed at the number of folks who love me just the way i am… the rest of ’em… well screw ’em…im not trying to live their life…. i dont need/want what they have… and im ok with that…its just that sometimes…. i wish they were ok with it too…

now …

could somebody please go tell my mom im happy… thanks…

xoxo

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